Fool’s Water (Twater)

(Sung to "Cool Water")

 

They say I make a grand mistake

about the state of twater--

fool’s water--

a twin-earth guy who drinks when dry,

and can’t think I see water--

two-H-Oed water.

 

(chorus)

Keep a-thinking Burge, Putnam’s got a cunning urge

he’s concocted quite a merge

of gedanken with a surge

of twater.

Oh Burge can’t you see that externally

that water can’t be made of X&Y&Z--

just twater--

fool’s-gold water?

 

And so I’m fooled

to think I’m schooled

in molecules of water--

your old water--

my XYZ presents to me

a thought that flees from water--

two-H-Oed water.

 

(chorus)

 

Externalists!

Cease and desist!

There is no mist called "twater"--

fool’s water--

your fantasy involving me

is completely non-starter--

fool’s-gold water.

 

(chorus)