He Stopped Publishing Today

(sung to “He Stopped Loving Her Today” by George Jones; dedicated to Dr. Susanne Skubal—an excellent editor of her own stuff and others’--on the occasion of her retirement from over three decades of outstanding service at
the University of Wisconsin--Manitowoc)

 

He said he’d publish or he’d die—

She said resubmit, revise—

As the versions slowly climbed—

The rejections massed sublime—

They claimed each fixture of it flawed,

A flaccid maze of argument,

He resubmitted through it all

Claiming each point rebutted—

 

Rejection letters often fed

Into his inbox—not a few—

He saw underscored in red

All the noted “please review”—

I saw his CV just today—

Oh but I didn’t see no fears

Of a reconsidered say

On a paper out two years—

 

He stopped publishing today—

They stamped “rejected” and he saw

That more were coming on the way—

He stopped publishing today.

 

She sent fresh edits from her Mind—

Oh, and he wondered if she would—

But just counterfactually he’d find

That they were usefully much good—

 

He stopped publishing today—

They stamped “rejected” and he saw

That more were coming on the way—

He stopped publishing today.